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PDP, MOURINHO AND THE ANALOGY OF A LIMP PENIS, By Ikechukwu Obi

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PDP, MOURINHO AND THE ANALOGY OF A LIMP PENIS, By Ikechukwu Obi

NEWISSUES, Abuja

Ask Chief Toje Onovwakpo, the central character in Isidore Okpewho’s novel, ‘The Last Duty’ and he’ll tell you about the psychological torture an erstwhile sexually active man goes through on losing his virility unexpectedly. At a point, Chief Toje even begins to envy little children their God-given early morning non-sexually motivated erections. Yes, that’s how bad a limp penis can make a man feel.

Over the weekend, one couldn’t help a sense of vindictive satisfaction seeing Chelsea fans so humble, so docile in arguments, so accepting of indignation, so much like a limp penis. You see, a limp penis may have intentions to make an argument but simply lacks the strength (akwara in Igbo) to do so.
Yes, such is life!

So in politics.

I remember when PDP’s insufferable arrogance was even worse than Mourinho’s loud ego tripping. Today, they’re both like limp penises, PDP and Mourinho.
Yes, such is life!

I was just reading some of my old Facebook posts and conversations and I grinned at my very intense dislike for PDP and their thieving in-your-face arrogance. I attacked them as viciously as I attack APC today. So great was PDP’s impunity-driven glory that they boasted they’ll be in power for at least 60yrs. Today, PDP is embarrassingly limp and struggling to win elections even in its traditional strongholds. Like Chief Toje Onovwakpo who was married for many years and had sired children only to experience ‘network failure’ when mounting his wife one day, PDP is suffering same embarrassment today.
Yes, such is life!

You see, I just hate an arrogant bully! And when that bully is corrupt and extremely deceitful, I just can’t stand such a one. And that is what we have on our hands today as All Progressives Congress, APC.

Today, APC is strutting around Nigeria’s political landscape, loud and arrogant and spreading its corruptive influence through lies and manipulative deception. Her supporters are also proud and boastful of the negatives and telling Nigerians who speak out to leave the country. Like a virile and irresponsible penis, APC is going around sowing wild oats of lies and crappy brainwash but not to worry, having gathered political syphilis through its unsavoury activities, there’s no way it can avoid the fate of a limp penis. That is the natural order of things…yes, such is life!

With the way APC is carrying on politicking in PDP’s syphilitic footsteps, that is their next stage. Naturally.

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